January 27th, 2011

“The moment in between what you once were, and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place.” – Barbara De Angelis –

The music began to fill up my cells. My feet filled up first and my toes began to tap. The music filled up my legs and my hips and whirled round through my belly and slid across my back and shoulders and I began to sway. The music filled up my head and my eyes began to shine and I laughed out loud.

He took my hand and led me to an open space right in front of the musicians. He looked into my eyes and I saw they were filled with the softness of light and happiness. He took my hands and we began to move. My feet were tapping and stepping and twirling me around. Back and forth, over-under, round and round.

For those ten minutes all I knew was the dance. The music. Moving. His eyes shining and us laughing at our sometimes awkward steps. No one taught us the correct moves. We were making it up however the music led us. For those ten minutes there was no fear, no judgments, no failure. Only joy.

Is this what it means to live Present? Maybe the smug little clichés like being fully alive, or living life to the fullest, are really only asking that I let Life begin to fill up all my cells, beginning with my feet (since they’re the part that take me to the next step). Planning is good. Dreams are necessary. Reflection and evaluation are helpful. But the living itself—where the plans are executed, the dreams realized, the learning processed—that is present tense. It is present tense even when I’m not present to notice. I can spend a lot of my life somewhere else besides the moment I’m living. I can spend a lot of my precious days treating life as an odious task to be endured.

I am waking up to the choice that I have as I move through my days: will I live like I’m dancing?

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